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Tuesday, November 8, 2011

Guest Post: Kitchen Catastrophe


My dear friend Jenny is...how do I say it?...kind of a disaster in the kitchen. I tried to help last year, with monthly cooking classes, but they ended up being "laugh and drink wine and forget about what's in the oven" sessions. She has a boyfriend now who's a great cook...and I don't understand why she doesn't leave meals up to him. God bless her, she keeps trying.

She told me she was going to attempt one of the recipes I had pinned: Creamy Avocado Pasta. I asked her to guest blog about it...but when I got her texts, I decided to just publish them directly.

Note: This is no reflection on this recipe. Total user error. And, doesn't that photo look like she just threw the pasta on the plate? Yeah, 'cause that's exactly what she did.

Here we go:

I don't even know where to begin to tell you what went wrong with this pasta.

I don't have a food processor, which means I use a blender. The avocado was not blending up well, so I kept pushing it down with a rubber spatula. I got sick of doing that and taking lid off. So I put the rubber spatula in while it's running.


Then I have to dump it out to remove the piece of spatula that got chopped off.


Then, it's too thick. Randy comes in and says it needs more olive oil. I get annoyed because I don't stray from the recipe. It has the amount of olive oil in it that the recipe called for.


I hand it over to Randy to fix. He drops a knife in it while starting the blender. Knife and half the sauce go flying.


As I'm trying to add pasta to the sauce, the pasta keeps clumping up. I get frustrated and again walk away for him to fix.


He tells me to taste it and that I should be able to tell him what it needs. I get mad because no I shouldn't, I don't know what anything needs.


So, as very often happens when I cook...I'm mad and frustrated. But I'll take a *&^%*&^% picture and blog about this for you.

The final text came when I asked, "How did it taste?" Her response: "I'm too pissed to eat right now."

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